The Orchestra - 3 stars out of 10

The Orchestra - 3 stars out of 10

Zbig Rybczinski's "The Orchestra" is likely unlike anything that you have ever seen before.  The entire thing is completely bizarre.  Some of the sequences are cool, others are more along the lines of the creepy-nightmarish-type of bizarre.  When one of the least peculiar things in the film is a guy getting shaved and dressed amidst a bunch of dancing soldiers in an art museum, you know that you are in for a treat.  Through its extensive use of blue screen and layering multiple scenes (and multiple versions of the same characters) on top of each other, "The Orchestra" has a unique look of its own.  Chopin's Funeral March is probably the best-known sequence from this film and is quite chilling as it explores the cycle of life, from death to childhood to seduction to growing old and back to death.  It perfectly fits Chopin's music and brings the piece to life.  And then there's the half-naked bride and groom floating around in a church and doing flips to the tune of Schubert's Ave Maria.  Aesthetically, it is very beautiful.  But it is just one of the most obscure things that I have ever seen in my entire life.  The Bolero is really impressive.  I can't really comprehend how they could create such a seamless shot when logic dictates that there have to be cuts hidden somewhere in this 14-minute sequence.  "The Orchesta" is an interesting artistic expression in several segments, but each segment has a tendency to grow monotonous within itself.  Rather than watching this entire film for an hour, I would recommend watching one segment at a time since they are so loosely tied together anyway.  Regardless, the cinematography is incredible (as we would expect from one of the modern forerunners in this field) and the layers of special effects will blow your mind.

Nine to Five (9 to 5) - 6 stars out of 10

Nine to Five (9 to 5) - 6 stars out of 10

"Nine to Five" is classic 80's humor.  While I wouldn't claim it as my favorite comedy, the characters are good, the plot is ridiculous, and Dolly Parton gives a "well-rounded" performance.  It isn't difficult to see that this film derives all of its energy from its three heroines with their opposing personalities.  Parton is the dumb blonde that is smarter than she looks, Jane Fonda is the nerdy, insecure girl, and Lily Tomlin (as always) plays the strong-willed woman who can't keep her mouth shut.  Of course, there wouldn't be much of a plot without a wonderfully despicable villain, played by Dabney Coleman.  The film does walk the line between clever and corny and stumbles into the corny zone a few times (particularly during their stereotypical fantasies of killing their boss), but wanders back into the clever zone when their fantasies get worked into reality.  With a few unexpected twists, good characterization, and an ending that will leave you satisfied (since the villain doesn't get to "hang around" anymore), "Nine to Five" is worth a watch, even if just for its nostalgic look at the 80's and Dolly Parton's theme song.

The Number 23 - 8 stars out of 10

The Number 23 - 8 stars out of 10

As I was rewatching "The Number 23," I was really starting to wonder why I had given it such a high rating the first time around.  Carrey's serious performance is not as impressive as "The Majestic" or "The Truman Show," there was too much sex (p.s. don't watch the unrated version), and I wasn't really enjoying the Fingerling sequences.  But then the twist occured and everything came back into focus.  The reveal is so intricate and extensive that the word "impressive" cannot do it justice.  It is also so complex that it requires 10-15 minutes to bring everything to light.  I'm trying not to give anything away, but when they go back and forth between "realities" to show the parallels, everything perfectly adds up to 23.  And you'll  23 everywhere that you go after this movie is over.  Birthdates, badminton scores, license plates - you name it and it'll add up to 23.  Despite what I said about Carrey earlier, he manages to drive the film through his intensity and contrasting personalities.  Sometimes he feels a bit over the top, but it isn't worthy of his Razzie nomination.  Virginia Madsen is inspiring in this role as her dedication to her husband leads her to do anything to cure his illogical behavior, especially when he begins to threaten her.  Danny Huston is good as the sometimes antagonist and I love Lynn Collins as The Suicide Blonde, just because it's such a cool role.  "The Number 23" has been heavily panned by critics.  And by heavily panned, we're talking pure hatred.  But its twist is too good to resist and I don't think that you will regret watching it.

The Fly (1986) - 7 stars out of 10

The Fly (1986) - 7 stars out of 10

"Be afraid.  Be very afraid."  "The Fly" is one of the most shocking things that I have ever seen.  It puts some of today's CGI effects to shame through it's elaborate and vomit-worthy make-up.  David Cronenberg has created unforgettable imagery that makes the original 1958 "The Fly" look laughable.  This film is so gross that it is impressive.  It's very title gives the impression that it is going to be a campy monster movie with a fake-looking mask, but this film reaches so much sophistication through its make-up effects and character development.  I am going to do something that I make a point never to do, but I am going to compliment Jeff Goldblum.  This is the only thing that he needs to list on his resume.  He is absolutely fabulous in this role.  Although the physical transformation is obvious, he acheives the internal conflict that David Hedison tried to in the original (but couldn't since his character didn't speak) as the fly slowly takes over his personality and logic.  He becomes physically unrecognizable but sustains his character's mannerisms to create empathy for his plight.  At first, I did not see the potential for memorable acting (or even good acting) in this film, but about 20 minutes in you realize that there is more to the film than creature effects.  Geena Davis is incredible, not only because she is always adorable but also because she gives this character a lot of unexpected depth.  When she is faced with her two moral dilemmas (baby and mercy kill), there is so much emotion.  The film is filled with images that you will not forget.  I can honestly say that I will never arm-wrestle again after this movie!!!  That was one of the most unexpected things that I have ever seen in a movie!  Even without the infamous Monkey-Cat Fusion scene that was cut before "The Fly"s initial release, this film will shock you over and over again (like the first baboon teleportation and the birth scene).  Add in his ear falling off and the acid-vomit-scene that left my jaw on the floor for a solid 3 minutes, and you will have to admit that the special effects are incredible (even if they are miserable).  The 1986 label of this film is misleading - "The Fly" is much more than another "Friday the 13th" scary movie and it can easily keep up with our modern chillers.

The Fly (1958) - 5 stars out of 10

The Fly (1958) - 5 stars out of 10

There is currently a fly buzzing around my apartment and it is really freaking me out.  Remind me never to make enemies with a fly.  Anyways, "The Fly" actually surprised me for a 1950's sci-fi film.  I enjoyed the story and the acting, but it lacked the grotesque punch of the 1986 remake.  It is set-up as a mystery, beginning with the ending and then flashing back to show how we got there.  I like the storytelling technique but feel that it resulted in very little of the film being about the fly.  In fact, the actual (unseen) fly transformation doesn't occur until 2/3 into the movie, and we don't get to see the fly until the last few minutes.  That being said, I was very impressed with the amount of drama created leading up to the moment when we finally get to see this man partially transformed into a fly.  It isn't exactly the most realistic creature, but welcome to the 50's.  The classic removal of the covering from his head and then dozens of images of his wife screaming (as seen through the lenses of his fly eyes) are worth waiting for.  I just wish that less of the film would have focused on fly hunting and more of the filmi would have been about Andre dealing with his fly-like symptoms (as in the remake).  Regardless, Vincent Price and David Hedison create a lot of suspense in their roles while Patricia Owens fills the film with mystery from her opening dialogue to her madness after the murder.  And she is really nice to look at.  If you have a weak stomach, watch this version.  If you want to see amazing character develompent, a disgustingly realistic transformation, and overall better story, stick to the 1986 version.

Forever Strong - 8 stars out of 10

Forever Strong - 8 stars out of 10

The critics may have hated "Forever Strong," but I found it to be a moving sports drama that explores an important theme that has often been left out - the effect of strong moral behavior on a team's success.  Coach Larry Gelwix has accomplished incredible feats as a result of his strong code of ethics and I'm thankful that his story has become accessible through this film.  Who knew that there was more to Gary Cole than "Office Space"?  He was fantastic, giving a very heartfelt performance.  I loved all of the Christian values that his character had, and belief that rugby is not about building a strong team, but about building men that are strong in character.  I was also really buying into Sean Astin's performance.  I like that this film showed underage drinking and drugs in a negative light, as most films glamourize it and add to our country's moral downfall.  Although I found much of Sean Faris' acting to be overdramatic or over the top, his character had a nice transformation (in spite of his acting) and I could truly feel the change of heart by the end of the film.  Neal McDonough was also pretty hit or miss, creating the emotional climax of the film with that one tear, but also feeling WAY overacted in the first half of the movie.  "Forever Strong" is a film that can be enjoyed by families, and teach a lot, too.  With intense rugby action enhanced by great cinematography and a story that you desperately want to resolve the right way, this success story of Larry Gelwix's morally driven coaching style will leave you satisfied.

The Adjustment Bureau - 8 stars out of 10

The Adjustment Bureau - 8 stars out of 10

"The Adjustment Bureau" is just one of those movies that will blow your mind and still have you comprehending its conceptual implications 24 hours later.  I was initially surprised to see Matt Damon's name on the film, expecting it to be another gimmicky Hollywood money-maker.  Little did I know that it is exactly his type of film: a great one.  The awesomeness begins with the concept that is progressively revealed throughout the film.  Who are these adjusters and what is their purpose?  The perfect amount will be revealed in due time, but a limited amount so that our imaginations are allowed to do their job.  Outside of the great chemistry between Damon and Emily Blunt, this movie drew me because of its open-ended interpretation.  It was really interesting to put this story into the context of God and His angels.  It brings the debate between predestination and free will into a real-world context while keeping it from being an obvious religious theme for the first half of the film.  I love that we never get to meet the Chairman, giving the impression that he is omnipotent and can only be seen in this world through others.  The most impressive aspect of the film is that we are drawn into this sci-fi world and never have the chance to question the bizarre content of the film - we just accept it from the start.and never look back.  "The Adjustment Bureau" is a solid film that is sure to bend your imagination and leave you contemplating far after the credits roll.