Get On Up - 7 stars out of 10

Get On Up - 7 stars out of 10

“Get On Up” pays tribute to the Godfather of Soul by telling his life story through the lens of the his strong and passionate personality.  There is never a moment in this film when you think “That isn’t actually James Brown.”  The performance of Chadwick Boseman is extremely convincing and this role is a strong follow-up to Boseman’s breakout role in “42.”  I appreciate his dancing but wish that he would have provided all of the singing.  In casting the film, director Tate Taylor chose to fall back on two of the actresses from his Oscar nominated film “The Help.”  I felt as if Octavia Spencer was underutilized but Viola Davis had a nice chance to shine.  Perhaps the best part of the film is its excuse to play Brown’s greatest hits and recreation of some of his significant career highlights.  The scene where Brown is questioned on the rhythmic disparity in “Cold Sweat” between the horns the drums is a simply awesome insight into his mind.  While I enjoyed the acting and the music, I had a few issues with the script.  There were times where it seemed logical to show the timeline out of order, and others where it did not.  I could tell that the titles of the various “chapters” had some sort of meaning but I didn’t really get any of them.  “Get On Up” is a valuable opportunity to learn about an important influence on modern music.  The story leaves out some key events so it cannot be taken as fact, but it is certainly a start into understanding the life of James Brown.

[Pictured: Boseman or Brown?  You won't be able to tell the difference]

Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues - 6 stars out of 10

Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues - 6 stars out of 10

I was pretty disappointed with “Anchorman 2.”  It was entertaining but after a grueling 9-year wait, I expected more from this sequel.  I suppose that my disappointment is a reflection of the genius contained within the first film.  The unpredictability, off-the-wall humor, quotability, and clever story just could not be replicated.  This is very apparent in Will Ferrell’s one-line exclamations (“By the hymen of Olivia Newton-John!”).  They were so funny in the first film but their appearance in the sequel makes them feel overdone; meanwhile, if they were left out, we would all be complaining.  This film simply could not win after the first one became so iconic.  The movie does have its high points, like the first scene with Brick.  The writers were smart to feature Brick and give him an equally dim-witted companion.  We all wanted to see another Battle Royale with rival news stations and we got it (including even more cameos and the ghost of Robert E. Lee).  The blind sequence creates some really funny jokes and the jazz flute even makes an appearance.  But this entire film felt like the writers were trying to insert new dialogue into the first film’s successful equation and the result is a total lack of cohesion.  It is fun to see these characters up to their old antics but “Anchorman 2” is just another failed attempt at a comedy sequel.  That being said, I'd still pay to see another installment in this series.

[Pictured: The movie could've used more Christina Applegate and less recycled jokes]

Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy - 9 stars out of 10

Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy - 9 stars out of 10

“Anchorman” is my favorite Will Ferrell comedy.  The film has all of the stupid humor that you expect but presents it through memorable characters and an immersive 70’s atmosphere.  It feels like much more than a slapstick comedy because the music, costuming, and satirical portrayal of chauvinism in the workplace are so perfect for this time period.  The film works as a legitimate period piece and the costuming probably deserved an Oscar nomination.  So much of the humor in this film is derived from male stereotypes and it works so well because of how true this was in the 70’s.  It seems like the film market is so oversaturated with comedies that they are all the same, but this film distinguishes itself through Will Ferrell’s iconic character.  Ron Burgundy is one of those characters that everybody recognizes even if they haven’t seen the movie.  Just like Austin Powers, The Blues Brothers, and Happy Gilmore, this character is constantly present in our culture through his loudly projected television voice, one-liners (“Well, that escalated quickly”/” I don't know how to put this but I'm kind of a big deal”), and outlandish exclamations (“By the beard of Zeus”/“Knights of Columbus, that hurt”).  The news team is rounded out with comic actors Paul Rudd, David Koechner (who would later play Todd Packer on “The Office”), and Steve Carell as Brick.  Carell doesn’t have many lines but steals the show through his constantly clueless state and dimwitted delivery of lines.  This role thrust him into the spotlight right before he was cast in “The Office” and set the wheels in motion to make him a star with “The 40-Year-Old Virgin.”  The script is really well-written, providing dozens of quotable jokes, getting "Afternoon Delight" stuck in your head, and even drawing in Vince Vaughn, Luke Wilson, Tim Robbins, and Ben Stiller for an epic Battle of the News Anchors.  There really isn’t anything bad to be said about “Anchorman.”  Its short runtime keeps it from getting old, the off-the-wall jokes are completely unexpected, and you laugh from start to finish.

"There's only one thing a man can do when he's suffering from a spiritual and existential funk."

"Go to the zoo, flip off the monkeys?"

"No.  Buy new suits"

All: "YAAY!!!"

The Cheating Pact - 4 stars out of 10

The Cheating Pact - 4 stars out of 10

“The Cheating Pact” is surprisingly interesting for a Lifetime Original Movie.  The acting was better than expected and I actually found myself caring a lot about the characters and conflict.  The film isn’t that great but I believe that we latch on to the story because we’ve all taken the SATs… I mean, the CETs (painfully obvious name alteration to avoid a lawsuit) and felt the pressure to do well with our futures in mind.  I don’t know how loosely it is based on true events, but that’s what drew me in.  If this was purely fiction, I proaly wouldn’t have gotten more than 5 minutes into it.  I really enjoyed Laura Wiggins in the role of Meredith and would be interested in seeing more films with her.  Laura Ashley Samuels (Kylie) was also very good but Max Carver was basically just a Matt Damon lookalike whose did very little for the film.  I can rarely tolerate a Lifetime Original Movie, but I will admit that I might consider watching “The Cheating Pact” again someday.

[Pictured: Seems like this cast would be overdramatic, but they were actually quite good]

Lone Survivor - 8 stars out of 10

Lone Survivor - 8 stars out of 10

“Lone Survivor” is a graphic portrayal of the war in Afghanistan.  It is based on the true story of Navy SEAL Marcus Luttrell and can be considered the “Saving Private Ryan” of modern warfare.  The extreme war violence and strong language should be taken into consideration before watching this film.  It is hard to watch at times but the images pay tribute to the bravery of our soldiers and create awareness of the sacrifices that they have made.  I was completely amazed by the resilience of these soldiers as they band together and fight for their lives with broken bones and shrapnel in their legs.  Our emotional connection with the soldiers relies on a scene early in the film in which they decide to do the right thing when encountering a group of shepherds; in fact, just thinking about the scene and the resulting Taliban attack makes me very angry.  I thought that Mark Wahlberg might be a distraction in the lead role since he is such a popular actor, but his quality acting supersedes his stardom and he truly embodies Luttrell.  All of the actors are great as you can see true agony on the faces of the SEALs and I felt particularly connected to the sympathetic Arab played by Ali Suliman.  I would find his portion of the story to be cheesy in most cases, but the fact that this sequence of events actually happened in real life restores a bit of my faith in humanity.  My main complaint with this film is the action sequences.  They move so fast that it can be difficult to follow and, while it builds the intensity that makes the film so gripping, “American Sniper” has showed me that a great script can help us to follow tactical action sequences without confusion.  Overall, “Lone Survivor” is a great film that everybody should see to better appreciate the sacrifice of our soldiers in Afghanistan.  It does justice to this unique war setting while bringing humanity to the Afghans who are on the innocent side of the conflict and face just as many trials as the soldiers.

[Pictured: The interactions between Wahlberg and Suliman create an unexpected theme]

Airheads - 3 stars out of 10

Airheads - 3 stars out of 10

“Airheads” is exactly what you expect.  Just picture Brendan Fraser, Adam Sandler, and Steve Buscemi as a group of unintelligent-nineties-surfer-loser musicians who are trying to get their demo played on the radio.  Yep, that’s “Airheads.”  I guess that the movie is okay for what it is, but when you compare the almost high-brow stupid humor in “Billy Madison” to this script, it’s just another bad Adam Sandler movie.  The film definitely gets bonus points for including Chris Farley and the studio hijacking plot works fairly well, but there comes a point where it’s clear that the writers were just trying to find a way to resolve the conflict.  Maybe people were really digging this movie during the prime of Sandler’s Saturday Night Live Career, but after movies like “Happy Gilmore” and “The Wedding Singer,” this one just feels like a weak stepping stone on his way to comic gold.

[Pictures: Yes, this movie is exactly what you think it is]

The Shaft (2001) - 1 star out of 10

The Shaft (2001) - 1 star out of 10
1200th review

Did this really happen?  “The Shaft” (a.k.a. “Down”?) is the most absurd premise since “Birdemic: Shock and Terror.”  Well, it actually came out nine years before “Birdemic” and managed to precede the recent trend of campy, absurd horror films.  The truly disturbing part is the $15 million budget.  There is no way that this film is intentionally bad.  The special effects, while not the most impressive in the world, were obviously an investment.  And what is Naomi Watts doing in this movie!?!?!?  I realize that she really struggled to make it in Hollywood for a while and this did come out before “Mulholland Drive” boosted her career, but then what are Dan Hedaya and Ron Perlman doing in it?  I truly believe that this was intended to be a serious film, so how did anybody think that this script was acceptable.  The dialogue is simply horrible, both due to the way that it is delivered through poor acting and the dialogue itself.  The premise is… well, this is a movie about a killer elevator.  With artificial intelligence.  And I don’t understand how anybody thought that this could be taken seriously:  “Now we’ve spent years establishing the fact that elevators are one of the safest modes of transportation.  We have to!  We live in a vertical world!  If we can’t trust elevators, what the [expletive] can we trust?”  I don't think that this far-fetched film will be scaring anybody away from riding elevators.  It has more elevator deaths than any other movie ever made, but their creativity is combated by overacting.  Proceed with caution if you elect to endure “The Shaft.”  It is fun to watch if you enjoy watching entertainingly bad films - I'll give it an extra star for unintentional comedic value - but you may want to drop your expectations before seeing it.

[Pictured: Nothing like a killer elevator that has a mind of its own...]