All Dogs Go To Heaven - 2 stars out of 10

All Dogs Go To Heaven - 2 stars out of 10

"All Dogs Go To Heaven" is a Disney wannabe that misses its mark.  The animation is very reminiscent of Disney and they have good actors in Burt Reynolds and Judith Barsi, but the songs are horribly cheesy and the story creates confused moral lessons.  It blantantly takes a stand against smoking but then shows that even a villain should go to heaven.  The film is worth watching to experience the final vocal performance of Barsi, who was tragically murdered by her father a year and 1/2 before this film was released.  However, if you are searching for a good family movie or an impressive animated achievement, I would recommend looking for something bearing the title of "Disney."

Skyline - 3 stars out of 10

Skyline - 3 stars out of 10

The mediocre acting (aside from Scottie Thompson who is the only one who can act) and flat characters in "Skyline" aren't as bad as the unoriginal story that rips off every alien movie to come out in the past 5 years.  Could they have more obviously ripped off the basement scene from War of the Worlds?  On top of the fact that the story is unoriginal, it doesn't really even exist.  It's more like an extended chase scene... in one room.  Toward the end, I began to forgive the film because the special effects in this apocalyptic setting were great and I was at peace with the ending... until the last 5 minutes ruined the entire thing.  It was as if someone said "We forgot to include a story, so let's make something up at the end to explain everything."  The Day 3 montage would have been an acceptible ending but then the movie continued.  The special effects are impressive but there are plenty of films with great special effects AND some sort of plot.

Everest (1998) - 3 stars out of 10

Everest (1998) - 3 stars out of 10

"Everest" provides insight into the dangers of mountain climbing, especially in the context of the 1996 tragedy on the mountain.  The shots of Everest are wonderful and I was surprised by the fantastic musical score, including an unexpectedly awesome orchestration of "Here Comes the Sun."  However, from an informational standpoint I feel as if this documentary does not dig deep enough into the expedition of these climbers.  It feels as if the writers said "Let's just give them enough surface information to have an excuse to show these incredible IMAX shots."  It's good, but not my favorite documentary.

Father of the Bride (1991) - 8 stars out of 10

Father of the Bride (1991) - 8 stars out of 10

Father of the Bride's great characters make for a very memorable comedy (which happens to be far superior to the 1950 film on which it was based).  Steve Martin's opening monologue and narration throughout the film puts this in competition with Dirty Rotten Scoundrels for his greatest performance.  His voiceover during the wedding scene was particularly moving.  It would be an injustice to review this movie without drawing attention to the genius that is Martin Short.  "Franck" (pronounced "Frahnk") is one of the best movie characters out there and his interactions with Steve Martin somehow manage to top "Three Amigos!"  Aside from all of the comedy, Steve Martin and Diane Keaton personify the life that we all desire - to grow old with the person that you love, raise a tight-knit family in a beautiful home, and watch your children grow up and find happiness.  It seems a bit sentimental for a comedy, but I guess that sometimes you can have your cake and eat it too.

Mad City - 8 stars out of 10

Mad City - 8 stars out of 10
300th Review

An interesting interpretation of how the media can take an accidental crime and first turn the man into a hero, then lynch him. Travolta is not typically an actor that I like, but he was incredibly convincing - anybody who has never seen a "typical" Travolta movie would probably believe that in real life he is a nervous and insecure person. The best aspect of this film is the character development and transformation in Travolta, Hoffman, and (unexpectedly) Kirshner. Prosky (who I remember from Mrs. Doubtfire) was great and, though his role was limited to the first 10 minutes of the movie, he perfectly set up Hoffman's character development. I love Ted Levine in any cop role and Alda proved to be despicable. Overall, Mad City has a decent plot but its strong cast and great character development make it a great experience.

The Land Before Time - 3 stars out of 10

The Land Before Time - 3 stars out of 10

Wow, the only movie that I have seen that is more driven by its soundtrack is Black Beauty.  James Horner's musical scoring is exciting, emotional, and constant as it proves to be the highlight of "The Land Before Time."  The animation is pretty basic and the movie sometimes has the "Milo and Otis effect", where the audience is merely watching a bunch of cute animals interact.  I like how they used 5 stereotyped children's personalities (the leader, the cute but annoying one, the quiet one, the nervous one, and the cocky/independent one).  The downfall of this movie is its lack of character development.  Although it might seem like I'm being pretty demanding since it's just a cartoon, after seeing movies like The Lion King and Up!, I believe that ALL movies should be held to the highest standards (even cartoons).  I guess I expected more with Spielberg, Lucas, and Marshall's names involved.  A childhood classic, yes... a great cinematic achievement, no.

Cop Out - 2 stars out of 10

Cop Out - 2 stars out of 10

Ladies and gentlemen, Tracy Morgan as... Tracy Jordan in... "Cop Out." I enjoy Morgan's character so much on 30 Rock but as a cop, it just didn't work. I love Bruce Willis in Die Hard and, although he is kick-butt in this movie, he failed to grab my attention. Other well-known names like Pollak, Lee, and Jones gave me hope but they couldn't save this weak story. In fact, the highlight of this film was Seann William Scott. His mockery of the cops was hilarious and was the main reason that I didn't shut it off. With an abundance of f-words and Morgan's antics (which were very hit or miss), this movie simply fell flat.

Nature: Tall Blondes - 9 stars out of 10

Nature: Tall Blondes - 9 stars out of 10

This documentary is a fascinating look into the world of nature's tallest mammal. Amidst stunning shots of giraffes in the wild, "Tall Blondes" is highlighted by Lynn Sherr's obvious love for giraffes - her passion will have you loving giraffes by the end of the film. PBS does a great job of weaving interesting information about the handling of giraffes with historical stories of giraffes. The house in the middle of the giraffe habitat is really cool and, while the whole pregnancy part was awkward, it was cute to watch the little calf try to stand up. Whether the giraffe is your favorite animal or you just enjoy documentaries, "Tall Blondes" from PBS' Nature series will leave you with a smile on your face and a giraffe in your heart.

Hot Tub Time Machine - 5 stars out of 10

Hot Tub Time Machine - 5 stars out of 10

As ridiculous as the title (and concept) is, the important thing is that they go back in time and then the story begins and the hot tub no longer matters.  I'm still getting over the fact that they used Crispin Glover in this film as a throwback to Back to the Future - so awesome.  And without question, his arm was the funniest part of the entire movie.  The movie is amusing but can't compare to "She's Out of My League" and "The Hangover."  There are way too many f-words, keeping in stride with the other recent movies of this genre.  Despite its shortcomings, I don't think that there's room for any complaints.  Afterall, what do you expect with a title like "Hot Tub Time Machine"?  It's the "Snakes On A Plane" effect, for sure.

Never Back Down - 3 stars out of 10

Never Back Down - 3 stars out of 10

Are we seriously supposed to believe that these ripped guys are in high school? I actually resent the producers for creating an MMA version of the Karate Kid. The one redeeming quality is Djimon Hounsou, but I question how he could accept this role after his incredible performance in Blood Diamond. Cheesy dialogue, subpar acting, and predictability are masked by cool fight sequences for a while, but in the end the bad acting make this movie a disappointment.

Clash of the Titans (2010) - 4 stars out of 10

Clash of the Titans (2010) - 4 stars out of 10

This movie is nothing more than a spectacle.  Despite bringing talented actors Neeson and Fiennes on board, the "plot" (or lack thereof) and characters are only there to facilitate an excuse for awesome creature special effects.  The scorpions were really amazing and the entire Medusa scene delivered intensity and a horrific creature, but I knew that the Kraken would make this film worthwhile (afterall, it was the focus of every trailer for Clash of the Titans).  After an hour and 1/2 of anticipation, the film reaches its climax as the Kraken begins its destruction for approximately... 2 minutes?  Major disappointment.  Clash of the Titans might be worth watching for the special effects, but you should consider fast-forwarding through anything that isn't CGI.

2012 - 2 stars out of 10

2012 - 2 stars out of 10

After months of anticipation at previews I faced the reality that this film was hastily thrown together in order to take advantage of the recent end-of-the-world hype.  Despite its cast of popular actors, they were unable to bring this poor script to life.  Incredible disaster special effects could have redeemed this film (as grim as it sounds, is there anybody out there that doesn't think that it is cool to watch the destruction of famous landmarks?), but the special effects fail to even match those of "The Day After Tomorrow" (which preceeded it by 5 years).  Without incredible effects, "2012" is unable to make up for the poor script, hastily considered concept, and average acting.

Patton - 7 stars out of 10

Patton - 7 stars out of 10

"Patton" has been lauded as one of the most powerful military movies of all time (as reinforced by its 7 Academy Awards), and this should be entirely credited to George C. Scott.  Though war films are not really my thing, I can appreciate the acting from Scott from his opening monologue to his final speech.  This is an absolute tour de force performance.  Unfortunately, this film tends to move at a snail's pace between battle scenes.  Overall, I would never put this film in my favorites but Scott makes it worth watching.

15 Minutes - 6 stars out of 10

15 Minutes - 6 stars out of 10

"15 Minutes" is another Hollywood attempt at showing the media's influence on crime and politics. For a bit, the first person perspective through the camcorder just wasn't working for me. I felt that they were using this gag because they didn't have enough faith in the strength of the plot. In the end, I realized that it was effective in getting the point of the movie across and appreciated the artistry. DeNiro was good and I enjoyed the performance by Edward Burns. Despite having some big actors, Karel Roden's acting was far superior to his supporting cast. Her part was small, but Vera Farmiga's sad eyes were perfect for her character. Although the film was average, I loved the mid-point twist had trouble accepting that it was true. This movie falls short of "good," especially because this plot could have been believable but the script failed. And it's painful to watch Kelsey Grammer try to prove that he is above sitcom acting in a role that uses an unnecessary amount of f-words to create anger and frustration. Overall, this movie is a one-time watch but worth it for the twist.

Event Horizon - 4 stars out of 10

Event Horizon - 4 stars out of 10

Event Horizon is one of the most bizarre films that I've ever seen!  It sports video game quality CG effects which aren't bad for 1997... until you remember that Titanic also came out in 1997.  However, the effects are good enough for this movie to thrive on its horrific imagery.  The airlock scene was hard to watch but graphically refuses to avoid what happens when a body enters deep space without a pressurized suit (as most movies typically avoid).  "Event" is another prime example of combining good actors with mediocre writing only to end up with mediocre acting (one dialogue exchange between Laurence Fishburn and Sam Neill comes to mind).  When in doubt, just watch Joely Richardson and she'll take your mind off of the dialogue.  Although the plot goes from far-fetched to absurd, any fan of horrific imagery will enjoy this film.

Old Dogs - 2 stars out of 10

Old Dogs - 2 stars out of 10

This family affair for John Travolta (literally, since his real-life wife and daughter play Robin Williams' wife and daughter in this film) starts low, ends low, and at no point rises above fairly low in quality. One important lesson can be learned from Old Dogs: The plot of The Pacifier (or Are We There Yet if you'd rather) + All-Star Cast = ...worse movie? Is this really possible? I understand that this is a family movie but have to question whether all of the content is appropriate for the target audience. From it's awkward beginning to its sudden ending, I have a feeling that Old Dogs will get lost in the shuffle... and we're all probably better off because of it.

Valentine's Day - 8 stars out of 10

Valentine's Day - 8 stars out of 10

You definitely know exactly what you're getting before you hit play on "Valentine's Day," but that is not necessarily a bad thing. As expected, this is a story of broken hearts, falling in love with your best friend, and loving someone for every part of them. It basically covers every aspect of love (good and bad) that one could experience so that every audience member can relate in some way. Some might complain that this movie falls short of expectations when you have a cast of (literally) 20 superstars since none of them stand out as a star; however, I think it's great that so many stars could humble themselves and take small roles to come together as a community of actors and deliver a heartwarming film. Though I won't comment on every actor in this film, it must be noted that Jennifer Garner is INCREDIBLE! This movie certainly has its moments, like the beautiful dialogue between Hector Elizondo and Shirley McLaine, Taylor Swift's reaction to the elevator kiss, and that scene between Jennifer Garner and the little boy was one of the most precious things that I've ever seen in my life! And just when you think that every facet of this story will end exactly as you expect, a 15 second scene will defy that predictability to leave you with a smile on your face and a tear in your eye.

The Untouchables - 10 stars out of 10

The Untouchables - 10 stars out of 10

Wow, if you're looking for raw, realistic acting then this is your film. The top notch performances by Costner, Garcia, Drago, and Smith deliver the realism necessary to bring life to this true story. And above all, Sean Connery delivers the greatest performance of his life, rightfully earning the Academy Award for Best Supporting Actor. Although a number of historical inaccuracies are contained in the film, this is an incredible telling of the fall of Al Capone. DeNiro plays the character with so much intimidation that even the audience will feel intimidated just watching the actors interact with him. This film does a great job of storytelling at a fast pace and never drifts into the slow crime drama tendancy. Finally, the amazing story is enhanced by the film scoring of Ennio Morricone (of "The Mission" fame) who earned an Oscar nod for his work. This movie is a masterpiece in every respect, from its excellent script to amazing cinematography that delivers unique first person views and impressive no-cutaway shots.

Eyes of Laura Mars - 4 stars out of 10

Eyes of Laura Mars - 4 stars out of 10

Faye Dunaway's acting was great but without an explanation of why or how, Eyes of Laura Mars leaves me with a sour taste.  Although I was not impressed with the first person filming (by the late 70's, it wasn't original anymore) or the story, the idea of violence being acceptable in art and consequently in our society was very interesting.  Despite this theme, the film fails to establish itself about mediocrity.

The Great White Hope - 4 stars out of 10

The Great White Hope - 4 stars out of 10

The character of Jack Jefferson and James Earl Jones' portrayal of him is incredible.  While the acting in this film is very real, its short runtime is a testament to the movie's great concept but poor development.  It felt as if the distance from point A to point B was very short and that little was accomplished.  I was hoping for Rocky with racism but found a little bit of boxing and a lot of arguments that didn't really advance the plot.

Date Night - 10 stars out of 10

Date Night - 10 stars out of 10

Aside from Carell and Fey portraying hilarious characters, Date Night manages to deliver a clever story, a lot of action, and a countless number of funny moments. The only movie that I feel falls into the same category as Date Night is Knight and Day, and this film was much more successful. Knight and Day was primarily action so the comedy seemed random and inappropriate; however, Date Night focuses on the comedy and tosses in several action sequences that compliment the humorous performances of Carell and Fey. The cameos by James Franco and Mila Kunis are hilarious, and Jimmi Simpson was the hidden gem in this film, bringing the perfect amount of grit and intensity to this comedy. In the end, Date Night is 100% comedy and 0% chick flick, yet it somehow manages to generate a few of the most incredibly romantic lines that I have ever experienced. Aside from the movie being absolutely hilarious, it?d be worth it just to hear Steve Carell deliver those final lines. Forget Dinner for Schmucks - this is the best Carell movie since Anchorman.